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Where to start. I guess at the beginning. But seriously, where is the beginning? I think this may be a new beginning, so perhaps I’ll start here.

I haven’t written much lately, maybe you’ve noticed. Maybe you haven’t. No matter. The times, they are a changin’. Why now? What’s different? Something happened. I feel I’ve been given a reboot. I’m starting over in a few different areas. Maybe one restart generated the next.

So why now? What has changed?


The fire within is burning brighter. What started as an ember is being fanned into a flame and will hopefully ignite into a full blown, raging sea of fire.

But what has changed?

At age 49, I am finally realizing that it’s not enough to want to do something, to want something. To make it happen, you have to take action. I’m not dense, I’ve known this and even acted on this in the past. Just not recently. I heard a podcast a few weeks ago about planning. I’ve never been a planner, much to the dismay of my sweetheart who is a total planner. I’ve pretty much always flown by the seat of my pants and for the most part that has worked for me. But this planning thing, I think they could be on to something with this.

I’ve been so wishy-washy the past couple of years since I left my job in Las Vegas and moved to Bend. Relishing the complete freedom I suddenly had, I found it hard to commit to almost anything. Not that I didn’t or haven’t been doing anything, I’ve been busy for sure. But I opted to do things based on how I felt at that moment versus planning and showing up regardless. I’ve had a loose schedule, basically no schedule, for the past couple of years with a few small random commitments here and there.

Muse Camp helped or is helping. There was a lot of talk about setting intentions. There was a lot of talk about showing up. Set your intention and show up. Then take even just 1 small step toward your intention and appreciate yourself for that. Just showing up is a step in itself toward a goal. Who knew?!

Show up. This resonated with me, maybe because it was said over and over again. But it sunk in. You want to progress? You want to make some changes? Show the fuck up in your life.

So, that’s my plan. And I’m taking steps toward what I want by doing so.

I want to write more SO I joined a writing Meetup. I not only joined it but I showed up! That was the first step. Guess where I started writing this from? You’ve got it! And to continue with the showing up theme, I’ve decided to start posting on my blog again although I’m not sure what I’m going to be writing about. Of course, I never am sure of that initially but the words won’t show up if I don’t show up.

I want to create and perhaps even make some moolah SO I started to draw up some ideas I have. I followed instructions from the podcast I mentioned on planning and made a list of challenges I might face, then I turned those challenges into a to-do list. Those were more steps toward this goal. I took another step by looking at class schedules and I found a class that could get me closer to my goal. Look at all these steps I was able to take so easily!

I want to lose weight and/or tone up this 49-year-old body SO I started taking the dogs on longer walks and instead of driving to go do things around town I’ve been walking more. I made a point of actually showing up to my yoga class, I even walked to it, and I found a 2nd yoga class I’d like to take.  I also started running again.

I want to get back into running more and running longer distances, which means running consistently, SO I signed up for next years TransRockies run, a 6-day run through the mountains in Colorado. I showed up for a series of adventure runs at my favorite running store. I even signed on as a running coach for an upcoming training program.

I want to feel better during and after running SO I decided to be proactive health-wise, a novel idea, right?  I have been doing what my awesome physical therapist told me to do since March but I didn’t feel any better so I decided to try a different type of doctor. (So far so good. Wish me luck!) I also started using the foam roller for recovery after working out and, as I said earlier, I showed up to my yoga class and decided to do even more yoga.

SHOW THE FUCK UP. That’s what I’m doing. It’s a powerful thing and it is now rolling over into all aspects of my life. I am already seeing the results and am excited to see what else I can make happen.

Show up.

Be curious.

Try new things.

I looked for dance lessons, that’s on my list of things I want to do. I didn’t yet find anything but it’s there on my radar. I also want to check out the climbing gym and I found a couple of friends who would like to join me. Also on my list, piano lessons. Gotta find me an instructor. I want to get into meditating. I enjoy it and I need it. I’m looking forward to a book club and also a writing class I signed up for, they will be starting soon. Always so much to do!

I get caught up in staying active, fearing that if I’m not busy doing a bunch of things then people will think I’m lazy. But I’ve come to realize this past year that I really need down time. I need the quiet time to allow thoughts, ideas, and creativity in. Not only to allow them in but I need that time to muse with them, to be quiet and sit with them for a spell.

That being said, saying yes to anything and everything that comes at you isn’t the same as showing up for the things that you are curious about or that mean something to you. So when you show the fuck up, which I hope you eventually do, make sure you are showing up for all the right reasons – most importantly, for yourself.